Fuck appropriateness.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
