real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He better not be in your backpack
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
