So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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