that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
