Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
