How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
