He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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