he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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