Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize