Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
