he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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