Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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