god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize
