my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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