so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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