trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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