he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
