I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
