She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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