May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Let's paint friendship bongs
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
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