I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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