Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
