Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
