well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
