I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
