the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize