where does the pee come out of this thing
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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