All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Randomize
