I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
A+ Viking dick
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
