she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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