His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
