I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
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