Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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