Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
