Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
