Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I don't deserve a penis
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
