Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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