are you still at the devil's house?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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