i already hear my dad disowning me
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
My vagina is officially offended.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
