kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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