North Korea, Best Korea!
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
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