I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
