so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
