Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
