Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
