i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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