last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize