It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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