would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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