This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
