I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
