i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
